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Author Topic: Alcohol Warning Labels  (Read 1489 times)
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CK1
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« on: March 22, 2008, 02:49:48 PM »

Due to increasing product liability litigation, American liquor manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels be placed immediately on all containers:


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite Sex without spitting.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your ass kicked.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees, and lower back.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are invisible.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the time-space continuum, whereby gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.


WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy
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Our death is not an end if we can live on in our children and the younger generation. For they are us, our bodies are only wilted leaves on the tree of life. Albert Einstein
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